In the interest of education, here is a very scientific representation of what it is like to have an earworm infestation.
See, Citizens of Texas? You can be sure that when I am governor, your children will receive the finest education. Have no fear, Loki is here!
I have contracted some sort of horrible Midgardian malady!! I have a truly inane mortal song stuck in my head, and nothing I do can jar it loose. Sigyn was singing it yesterday, and now the lyrics are looping endlessly–and I don’t know what half of them even mean:
I’m steppin’ out with my baby
Can’t go wrong ’cause I’m in right
It’s for sure, not for maybe
That I’m all dressed up tonight
Steppin’ out with my honey
Can’t be bad to feel so good
Never felt quite so sunny
And I keep on knockin’ wood
The human female has diagnosed the condition as an earworm. What in the Nine Realms?! Is it fatal?!
(Later) I am relieved to learn that “earworm” is merely a figure of speech and not an actual parasite. The human female has demanded that I stop humming and has threatened to infect me with the (supposedly even more insidious) Scalloped Potato Song if I do not cease. I told her I would try, if she would tell me who wrote the stupid thing and explain why someone would thwack lumber and why so many of the song’s words are missing a terminal “g.”
(Still later) I have banished the earworm by rehearsing to myself the speech of conquest I shall make to the assembly at tonight’s inauguration ball. Now that I am free of the stuck tune, I can contemplate its lyrics without going mad. They seem very appropriate for today. I do not know aught of this “Irving Berlin,” but he had the right of it. There’s nothing quite like putting on one’s finest and going out for a night on the town with one’s beloved!
Sigyn, you look lovely. I have obtained a bottle of the bubbly wine mortals use to celebrate special occasions. We can share it on the limo ride.
Austin won’t know what hit it!