Can’t pin this one on me

Do I think it’s funny to watch the human female do the trying-to-toe-off-the-rubber-boots-while-carrying-parcels-and-a-backpack dance?

Yes.

Did I chuckle a bit when all of the spaghetti squash growing in her compost heap died of powdery mildew and some other malady?

Maybe…

Do I snicker at how the floor CONSTANTLY needs sweeping from all the damp dirt and leafy bits that keep getting tracked in?

Indubitably.

Am I gleeful at all the human plans that have been ruined due to incessant inclement weather?

Never doubt it.

However, I want it on record that I am merely making the best of a bad situation, NOT claiming credit for the recent rains and flooding.

Nope. This:

elFSV949RFAiRFnwWYMAsZax9aR7cxQZYbAhUN9JZ7w=w286-h381-no

…was not my doing. Sure, seeing all the washed-away cars piled up on the roadside was interesting, but people died. I wouldn’t do that. I need all the minions and thralls I can get.

>|: [

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