It is a well-known fact that my best-beloved Sigyn needs rather a lot of rescuing. She is always falling down, getting trapped in various tight spots, and being pounced upon by various wild beasts. Not mention being kidnapped by evil doppelgangers! I am ever-vigilant, lest she come to harm. No place is truly safe.
Now it appears that I will have to monitor her internet usage. She likes to “surf” the web, looking at glass paperweights, planning her dream garden, mulling over needlework patterns, and contemplating various recipes, and all of this is usually harmless. Sometimes, however, she will stumble upon something disturbing and suffer from nightmares or the collywobbles. (Cuddles are usually enough to dispel collywobbles. Nightmares can be more problematic, requiring the application of cuddles, cookies, AND hot cocoa. This is known as the Three C Method. )
Today I’m getting that tingling in my left horn that tells me she is in danger–or about to be so. What is this that she has gotten into? She has found a humorous trove of videos of someone crushing things in a large hydraulic press.
Ehehehehe! Smashing an alarm clock! Yggdrasil knows I’ve wanted to do this myself.
Ahahahaha! Today’s menu–fruit salad! Ehehehee–why is this so funny?
Ahem. No, I am not giggling! I am a god. Giggling would be beneath my dignity.
At any rate, this seems to be some harmless fun, apart from some colorful language and the demise of some even more colorful clay animals. My danger-sense must be off toda–
Norns’ nighties! No, Sigyn, don’t watch the next one! For the love of all that is good, DO NOT WATCH THE NEXT ONE!