The humans get a LOT of junk mail. Whether it is because they are junky people or because I have put the human female’s name on every mailing list in the English-speaking world is neither here nor there. What’s important is that it means that every horizontal surface in the house is archaeologically layered in pre-approved credit cards, requests for charitable donations, catalogs for items produced in Knicknackistan, and coupons for restaurants they never patronize.
Every now and then the human female will Pull a Tidy, gather it all up, and feed the shredder until I am ready to do anything to make the noise STOP.
Uh, oh. Looks like we are in for quite a session today.
I tried to distract her so that it’d gobble up some staples and chew itself to a blissfully silent halt, but she managed to get this mess sorted before it hit the grindy-teeth. The staples were consigned to the trash, the non-personally-identifiable paper has gone into the recycling, the sensitive documents are now confetti, and all that is left is a strange yellow glob that has Sigyn amused.
What have you got there, dearest? Let me see.
Odin’s eypatch! Whatever it is, it is certainly s t r e t c h y! We can have a weird little inedible taffy pull!
Look–it has the imprint of little numbers in it. Oh, I know!! This is that goop that sticks credit cards to paperwork. This stuff is awesome!
You hold that end, Sigyn, while I go off this way. I want to see how far this booger glue will stretch…