Day: March 14, 2018

Zooward, Ho!, Part III: Da Bears

Not all of Midgard’s furry creatures are abundant or even common.  Panda bears, those reverse saddle shoes of the ursine world, are as rare as Thor’s clever ideas.

They’re also terribly shy.


Come on out, you four-footed Texas police cars.  My sweetie wants to take your photo.

That’s better.  Would it kill you to smile a little?


They all have the same oreofied coloration, don’t they?  However do the keepers tell them apart?


Oh.  I guess one has a bigger nose than the other.  But that’s really only useful if you see them side by side.  They’re still an awful lot alike.  Maybe that’s whey they’re critically endangered in the wild:  Every time one of the silly selectively pigmented critters sees another of its own kind, it thinks, “My, how handsome I am!  But why is China so full of mirrors?” and it develops only narcissistic feelings and no amorous intentions.

Come, Sigyn, let us leave the bicolored beasties to their own omphaloskepsis and move along to observe some large carnivores with even less melanin.


Aw, that little cub is endearing, isn’t he?  I can see why you’d want to take him home and cuddle him.  But did you know that these things grow up to eat cars?

On second thought, let’s bring the little terror tyke home.  The human female is always saying she doesn’t much like her car.  I think I can help her out with that…

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