Month: October 2018

Let the Feast of Horror Begin!

It is that time again–the annual Midgardian celebration of costumery and candy extortion.  Sigyn is very excited.  She has been planning for months what she wants to dress up as!

You see, she has been reading a lot of Dumas lately.

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This one is her favorite.

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For weeks now, it has been nothing but, “Porthos, this,” “Aramis, that,” and “Athos, the other thing.”

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It’s all I’ve heard about.  (Don’t even get me started on Dart-whatshisface.)

At any rate, she hasn’t confided in me, but it’s a pretty sure bet that she’s going to turn up dressed as something from the book.  Milady, perhaps, or the Queen, or…

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Great Frigga’s corset!  I suppose now there are five Musketeers!  Well done, my love!  You look every inch the perfect cavalier!  And I suppose you’ve been practicing your right-handed swordsmanship so that you can cry, “But what you do not know is that I am left-handed!” in the middle of a fight and switch hands.  Very clever!

But what about me?  What did I decide to be?  I too have been very secretive.  Sigyn is waiting…

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I’m about to make my entrance!

I’m sure you can’t guess, so I’ll give you some hints.

It was the most gruesome thing I could think of.

I don’t think anyone has done this costume before  (It’s too hideous!)

Definitely not for the faint of heart!

Send the kiddies out of the room!

Are you holding on to something?

Scroll

down

at

your

own

risk…

Behold!

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I am the human female!  Pony-tailed Science Nerd and Queen of Everything Boring!  Isn’t it awful?

“Look at me.  I’m the human female.  I have some nasty chemical from the Vendor Who’s Responsible, blah, blah, blah…”

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“Look at me.  I’m so important.  I wrote a book.  It’s so BIG.  No one’s read it but don’t you wish you’d written a book?  Nyah, nyah, nyah.”

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I’m sure to scare the pants off everyone today!

But where is Fisi?  That stupid hyena was supposed to bring the pillowcase for candy and go with us.

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Late as usual.

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Let the sanctioned pillaging begin!

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Sooo Many Rescues

We’ve had a nice visit with the new neighbors, but it’s time to be heading home.   It’s beginning to get dark early these days.

Whoa.

Sigyn, are you getting that creepy, “something’s watching me” feeling on the back of your neck?

Sigyn?

Sigyn?

Where did she___?

Munnin’s tailfeathers!  Let go of my beloved THIS INSTANT, you cantankerous, carnivorous corvid!

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Hang on, sweetie!  Loki’s coming!

Whew!  That was much too close for comfort!  All right, Sigyn, let’s just go home and make cocoa–

FENRIR’S FLEACOLLAR!  NOT AGAIN!

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Get your freakish dwarven hands off my beloved, you big lizard, or I’ll Thera your pod into teeny, tiny, bony slivers!

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That is NOT what I meant!

No time for witty insults!   Just…

ZAP!

Are you all right, my love?  I promise, that Saurischian menace will never bother anyone, ever again!

Let’s go home.

I think we need cocoa AND some cookies to go with–

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I give up.

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Meeting Some New Friends (Who Look Like They Need Feeding Up)

Sigyn and I have just run into some very strange…  strangers people beings in the neighborhood.

These wide-eyed fellows are very cheerful…

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…and appear to have benefited from some first-class orthodontia.

Sigyn is very much taken with these ladies’ flowery dresses and hats.

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That lady there doesn’t really have supernumerary arms.  She just has a lot of her sisters standing behind her.

They seem like very nice people overall.  Their landscaping is in need of some attention, though.  They should call a professional Consulting Arborist for this poor tree…

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…but I think it may already be too late.

And their kitty might need to see a vet,

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Even if he is friendly and gives rides.

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Fun With Tropical Fruit

Sigyn, come look!  There’s something weird in the break room!

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Do you know what that is?  Because I surely don’t!  I don’t trust it!

<knock, knock, knock>

Doesn’t seem dangerous—not like the last round, dark whatsit I investigated.  But whatever it is, it has a VERY hard outside!

It seems…plantoid.   By Idunn’s Fancy Orchard!   It’s a UFOUnidentified Fruity Object!

Help me roll it around so we can look at the the other side.

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Oh, now I know what it is!  On her last trip out of town, the human female found this in a Large Market.  It’s apparently a fruit that it’s nearly impossible to find fresh in this country.  What did she call it?  Not “mango”–I know what a mango is.  But something like that… Mango-steve?  Maybe?  I can’t remember.

She said they’re supposed to  be delectably sweet and somewhat floral inside.  But how does one open one?

Stand back, Sigyn!  She’s got a big knife and now she’s hacking away at the rind.  Bits are flying everywhere!

There!  Finally!

Odin’s eyepatch!  I’m pretty sure they’re not supposed to be gray and slimy inside!  After all that build-up, what a terrible let-down!

I will spare readers an image of the guts of this foul object, and refer you to someone who knows more about how to choose, store, and eat one of these things.

http://shesimmers.com/2009/07/how-to-choose-prepare-and-eat-mangosteens.html

Come on, my love, and we’ll go find some other sort of fruit.  The apples may be boring, but at least they’re not rotten.

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Sigyn Sports Seashells by the Sea Shore

It has been quite some time since Sigyn and I stopped in to see what the second-semester biology labs are doing.  I think we’ll remedy that today.

Ah.  Looks like they are in the middle of their studies of invertebrates.  Fine things, invertebrates.  I do like a good flatworm or scorpion now and then.  You know, just to leave where the human female can find them.

Sigyn is fonder of the mollusks.

Look at all these shells!

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I agree–the spirally ones are very elegant.  Go ahead and choose something you like. They’ve so many, I’ll doubt they’ll miss one or two.

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Bivalvia–what the well-dressed young lady is wearing this season!

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A New Friend

Not much going on today.  Just out for a wal—

Great Frigga’s corset, there’s something up there, behind the raisins!

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Not something–someone!

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Uh, oh.  This fellow looks like he could be dangerous!  Better summon Gungnir.

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**ΗË⌊⌊ø!**

What?!  Who are you?

**Μý  Πàμë  Ιš  βåΓηΕϒ**

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Barney, huh?  No offense, pal, but you look a mite high-strung, like you could go off at any second.

**¡ñÐ∈∈Р  ï   ÇõÛ⌉Ð! **

Well, there’s not room for two villains around here, and I already own this realm!

**Τõõ  βαδ…̓  ϒοû  ωìΝδ  Μé  υΡ,  Ì  çοùù⌊Р ß∈  ãn  ä⌊⌊ψ**

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Barney, I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship…

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Pop! Goes the Mischief!

The human male doesn’t like the College Station water.   News flash for you, mortal:

No one does.

So that’s why he avoids it when he can.  He drinks a lot of flavored fizzy water instead.  I’ve no objection to the concoction myself, but sometimes I get sick of tripping over twelve-packs of the stuff, and the human female is always asking me to take the cans out to the recycling barrel.

Fat chance.  Let the mortal take care of his own leavings.

Today, I have had enough.  I have bespelled his beverages, and half the ones in this particular carton, when opened, are going to practically explode with a loud noise and a bit of twisty metal just perfect for slicing fingers.

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Ehehehehe!  Look at him jump!

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