Day: September 17, 2019

A Different Sort of Weapon for My Arsenal

Do you remember all the fun I had with the human female and her Prep Staff and the pesky respirometers that arrived broken and that wouldn’t work?  Well, the semester has rolled around to that lab again, and I decided I wasn’t done making lives miserable and bringing shame upon Lower Division Biology.  (When things don’t work, complaints find their way up to the highest levels of admin and the repercussions flow downhill to the human female and her crew.)

Since the last time these apparatuses were used, the Prep Staff has been hard at work trying to find a replacement for the glass bean tubes that break and the rubber stoppers that won’t stay in.  They’ve settled on poking a hole in a screw-top centrifuge tube and using that.  The hole has to be sealed up, though, or the thing won’t work.  Today they’re working on that problem  And since I hear that the solution involves a “gun,” I demand to be involved!

This is the gun.


I’m not so sure how great a weapon this is.  It appears to run on electricity and requires to be plugged in, which would severely limit its usefulness in battle.  What sort of projectiles does it fire?

Sleipnir’s snot-balls!  It doesn’t actually fire anything!  Instead, it produces a stream of molten goo which is very, very sticky.  It dries and cools to something rigid, though.

(poke, poke, poke) Perhaps one is meant to adhere one’s enemies to one spot–and then dispatch them by some other means.


I must say I’m not impressed, and as a Frost Giant, I view anything that works with heat with more than bit of trepidation.

And then there’s the little matter of the stretchy, clingy, stringy THINGIES it leaves everywhere…


Nope.  Not impressed at all.  Although I think I could probably have fun decorating the human female’s work space with this stuff.  She’s certainly making enough of it, putting huge dollops of the goopy stuff on the inside and outside of the respirometer lids.

Ewww!  Ouch!  I think I’ve discovered what this weapon is good for.


And there’s a second nice blister on her other forefinger.

I take it back.  I LOVE this thing!

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