I enjoyed the Transilluminator caper so much that I’ve decided to—
Wheeep! Wheep! Crisis! Danger! The human female’s Prep Staff has indicated a critical and urgent need for some potion called “BugBuster.” She must order some today or the upcoming enzyme experiment just won’t work! Shouldn’t she have anticipated this? Probably. No one ever said she was gifted with forethought. Or that Prep Staff will tell her about shortages in a timely fashion.
What is this magical elixir? Nothing less than an arcane mixture of detergents and whatnots that are 100% guaranteed to break up the outer membrane of bacteria, releasing all of their prokaryotic goodness. It truly is marvelous stuff, its makeup a closely guarded secret, obtainable only from its maker, and priced similarly to a good caviar. The human female buys it with gritted teeth and doles it out by the milliliter.
Since the need is so dire, the human female can’t wait for a purchase order to wind its way past the approvers and through the labyrinth that is AggieBuy. No, she has to do an online order with that Biology credit card she won’t let me anywhere near.
There! Order placed. Now let’s see… What fun shall I have today? Out of stock? Shipment sent to the wrong continent? Credit card charged four times? Product recall? No. I’m feeling generous. I’m going to let her get her package quickly, with the billing handled properly and all the paperwork neat and tidy.
(Not too long afterwards…)
And here is the Bug Buster! Two precious 50 ml bottles.
Or, rather, one 50 ml bottle, and… that other one there. The one missing about $120.00 worth. I know what you’re thinking, mortal, and no, you can’t wring the missing volume out of the soggy, soggy packing slip. I don’t know what you had planned for the afternoon, but I think your schedule now involves trying to talk Ehehehehe Mischief Delivered (EMD) to send you a partial replacement.
Good luck with that.