Day: February 1, 2021

There’s Always Toast…

Sometimes it’s good to go back to basics. Remember the time I ruined the human female’s breakfast for multiple days running? Good times! I thought I’d see if I still have anti-breakfast-mischief mojo.

She set the slow-cooker to make oatmeal overnight last night. As soon as she went to bed, though, I turned the knob from “Low” to “High”, which should have resulted in the formation of a crock-pot shaped cinder block. Unbeknownst to me, though, the thing turned itself off for some reason and she woke up this morning to a pot of water and uncooked steel-cut oats. Nummers. When she tested the pot, it heated up just fine on low, so now we’re both confused.

And still breakfastless. Human female, today, I think, would be a good day for eggs. Let’s have a look at some from the latest carton I handed to the the human male at the market.

(Humming) “None of these things is quite like the others.” That photo doesn’t do justice to how long and skinny the one on the left is–or how it also has a sort of weird constriction about its middle– or how much the size varies, or the range of colors in this carton.

Soo many questions! Is that long, lumpy egg safe to eat? Did it even come from a chicken?? What does a snake egg look like???

And if you’ve lost your appetite for eggs and are going for the cold cereal instead, has Loki done anything to the milk????

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