Author: lokispeaks

Ridiculously smart and incredibly good-looking

On the Way Home From the Gaming Convention

Well, that was four days of my life I’ll never get back.

The convention is over, but it appears the adventure is not.  The human male has stopped at an odd little shop on his way out of town.  Sigyn, my sweet, would you like to explore?   Yes?  Then let us proceed!

What is this ceratopsian doo-dad?


A taco holder?  Really?


No, Sigyn.  No, don’t give me those puppy eyes!  As much as I think cluttering up the human female’s kitchen with strange, unitasker kitchen kitsch that isn’t going to fit anywhere would be fun, I really don’t want to spend money on this plastic dinner dino.

If you want to go for a little ride, though, I’ve no objection.


I might even join you.


There.  That was fun.  A good ending to our excursion.  What a trip this has been!  We survived late nights, long games, strange encounters with ecdysiast eggs, and multiple days of the human male’s company.  We’ve scouted out some real estate, taken a frigate for a test drive, and been invited to a penguin party.  Safe and sound, we are just about home free…



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Fun At the Convention, Day 4: This Place Is Full of Riff Raff

Gamers come in all shapes and sizes.  Little children like quick-playing games with cute characters and bright colors.  Women seem to like games with a social component.  Party games, they call those.  Your stereotypical strategy board gamer is a male, on the farther side of thirty, and nursing a big mug of Dr. Pepper.

I’m not here to meet people, though.  Other than to recruit them to my army.

Sigyn, on the other hand, wants to get to know everyone.

She’s entirely too trusting.   I shall accompany her as she does her little meet-and-mingle, because some of the attendees seem very odd.  I want to make sure she doesn’t get into  any trouble.

This character, for instance…


You, there!  Who are you?  What are you?


Besides purple and stoned-looking.

Whoever he is, he seems to have taken a weird paternal interest in my beloved.  I suppose that’s all right?


Though I’m deeply suspicious of people who won’t make eye contact!

Sigyn–look at this yellow fellow.  Didn’t we see his photo or read about him somewhere?  Isn’t he someone famous?  Or infamous?


I seem to recall something about being too lazy to get out of bed…?

Norns’ nighties!  DON’T LOOK, SIGYN!  He’s out of bed now–and not wearing any pajamas!


Sigyn, I think where you are standing is the only thing keeping this photo from being NSFW…


Time for a hasty retreat.

Whew!  What an eggceptionlly unpleasant encounter!

And here’s another shady-looking character.  Yes, you, with your beady eyes!


What’s your game, eh?  What’s with the branches and the berries?  Are you some kind of nature freak?


If you are, you might be just Sigyn’s sort of people!   All right, Sigyn, this one you can talk to!

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We Interrupt Your Gaming Fun For Some Remote Mischief.

While the human male is up here in the Big City to the North having fun at the boardgame convention, the human female is stuck at work.  This is final exam week.  TAs, instructors, professors, and admin (including the human female) are furiously uploading, massaging, and computing grades. Students are frantically trying to upload those last few homework assignments.  EVERYONE is using the online gradebook and course management website.

I can’t let this go unscathed, can I?

No, I can’t!

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.  Pictures WITH words say even more. As proof that I can do mischief remotely, I offer these images of what is going on back in Universityland:

final grades capture

The above was followed fairly swiftly by:


My favorite part is where they suggest no one do any grading..


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Fun At the Convention, Day 3: Loki, Terror of the High Seas

Both of the castles Sigyn and I looked at yesterday were best approached by sea.  I think a beachfront palace would be great!  Sigyn, let us do some scouting about and see if there’s a seagoing vessel we might…commandeer so that we can come and go as we please.

Ah!  Here is a worthy craft!


The sails are in need of mending, but the paintwork is fresh and bright.  It’s even your favorite color!

Take the helm, my love.  I shall go aloft and see if I can navigate a path out of this crowded harbor.


There certainly are a lot of ships!


A bit to starboard, my sweet!  I think I want to get well clear of the one flying the Jolly Roger!

What’s that my love?  I can’t hear you very well up here!


Oh.  We are flying a Jolly Roger too?

This could work!  Other vessels will steer well clear of us, and if we do run into any others, well, a pirate flag is like a license to pillage, so it’s all good!

Whew!  Safe back on the deck!  Sigyn, you might want to climb up to the crow’s nest yourself–the view is spectacular!


Sigyn says the sea monster on our mains’l looks friendly.


Come on down now, love.  The sea’s getting choppy, and I don’t want you to fall.


PLEASE be careful!!!

Yes, you can stand at the bowsprit–just do please hold on to something!  What if you lost your balance?  What if you fell overboard?!  Do you even know how to swim?


Huh.  Never mind.

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Fun At the Convention, Day 2: Have Fun Storming the Castle

We are still at the board-game convention.  I did not know there were this many board games—or this many nerds in the whole of Midgard.  If I could somehow come up with some good “rules of play” for my takeover of this miserable rock, I could recruit the whole hotelful.  Hmm…  Maybe some enchanted dice and some cute meeples…?

In any case, while all the mortals are busy arguing about turn-based stategy games vs. set-building games vs. cooperative games, they are leaving various games and bits of intriguing real estate completely undefended.

Big mistake.

Take this castle, for instance.  Sturdily built and ready to move into.


It even has a moat!

From here, I could survey my realm and work my will.


Of course, I might use my magic to make it a little taller than three inches…

But wait!  I see another keep off in the distance!  Perhaps that one would be better.

It’s certainly taller, and it’s already flying my colors!


Lots of loot lying about, ripe for the taking, and it certainly seems well-defended.

I have put the treasure chests aside for…safekeeping, so now I can really appreciate the view.

What do you think, Sigyn?


Would you like to live here?


Or maybe the footprint is just a tad on the small side…

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Fun At the Convention, Day 1: Thanks For All the Fish

The human male has made the annual sacred pilgrimage to big board-game convention in the Big City to the North–and this year Sigyn and I have come with him!  It was a long car trip, and the smell of nerd is strong in the air, but it means several days away from the human female, so I am 100% on board with this.

There is so much to see and so many people I could talk to–if I wanted to.  Which I don’t.  Sigyn’s having fun exploring, though, so I’ll just tag along with her and make sure she stays out of trouble.

Right off the bat, though, she’s discovered a labyrinth of some sort.  It’s all made out of ice—rooms and corridors and low-linteled doorways.


The cold doesn’t bother me (Jotun blood being superior).  I’ll put a little spell of warm protection around Sigyn so she doesn’t catch a chill.

Captain Spangles’ gymsocks!  What is that smell?!

Ugh!  Who lives here, and why do they have fish just lying around?


Oh.  Penguins.  That explains the stray osteichthyes over there.


I’ve never really had much use for penguins.  Beady eyes, fish breath, and always dressed up like they’re headed for a party to which everyone else is not invited.

Sigyn’s making friends, though…


I did not know penguins came in these colors.  I trust them even less now.


Oh!  Looks like this time we have been invited to the party!


Where they’re serving raw fish.

Figures.  Indulge in proto-sushi if you wish, my dear, but this is one feast I think I’ll skip.

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A Very Colorful Fall Walk, Part III: ‘Tis The Season For Poofiness

If there’s anything Sigyn likes more than colorful things, it’s fuzzy things.  Today, we seem destined to run into both.

These little asters may look daisyish and harmless now,


but when they’re done blooming, the fluffy fruiting heads will spread these plants all over the neighborhood.  It’s a full-time job trying to keep them out of lawns and gardens.

This  bluestem grass has much the same dispersal strategy.


I’ll have to make sure some floofs find their way into the human female’s hair and socks.

By Fenrir’s Woolly Winter Underwear!  What have we here?!


Ah, I see now.  It’s one of those weather-prognosticating lepidopterans.  Supposely, one can tell how severe the winter is going to be by the proportion of black to rusty brown in their coats.

Judging by this nearly-all-black one, we can expect a damp and chilly winter with…


…a ninety percent chance of snuggles.

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