I hardly slept last night, I was so eager to begin the process of amassing a coterie of skilled associates. The first interviewee will arrive shortly. Here is her resume. Some problems with formatting, but over-all, it’s impressive, don’t you think?
Ah. She has arrived and is quite animatedly talking with Sigyn.
(I am recording the interviews so that I don’t forget anything.)
Sigyn: Hello, Roberta, and welcome!
Roberta: I hate “Roberta.” Too girly. Call me Bob, please.
Sigyn: Um. Okay. Well, thank you for coming.
Bob: Nice place you have here, though it’s a bit smaller than what I’m used to, of course
Sigyn: Rutgers, right? Loki has some questions about that—
Bob: Who’s Loki?
Sigyn: He’s actually the one who’s looking for colleagues—
Bob: The guy with the horns over there? You mean you’re not the head of this operation?
Bob: Too bad. I work best with women. So, Lokes, What can I do for you?
Loki: Good morning. I’m particularly interested in your chemistry work. I do occasionally have need of someone capable of handling dangerous toxins. When do you think your Ph.D. will be complete?
Bob: Yeah. About that…
Bob: The doctorate is on hold. My um… major professor has had to step away.
Bob: Because he, uh, disappeared. No one has seen him since before Christmas.
Sigyn: Oh, no!
Bob: Yeah, it’s all very mysterious. He was very brilliant. Really good with poisons and such. I learned so much from him. But a real jerk. He was always calling me “Honey” and “Babe” and trying to pinch me. Used to make me furious.
Loki: I … see. So, um, what’s in the Erlenmeyer flasks?
Bob: I brought samples of my work. This yellow one is a hemotoxin approximately fifty times more potent than rattlesnake venom. It’ll rot you from the inside out, slowly. No cure. And it’s untasteable in lemonade.
Loki: Impressive. What’s in the blue one?
Bob: Looks like window cleaner, doesn’t it? It’ll clean windows all right, but spray it on and after an hour it out-gasses a substance that will knock out anyone within a forty-foot radius.
Loki: Most impressive. Tell me, Bob, what do you think you can offer my organization?
Bob: Well, I enjoy a challenge, and solving problems with chemistry. If anything–or anyone–is bugging you, I can make it– or them– go away.
Loki: Sounds good. Do you have any questions for me?
Bob: Yeah. Would I be reporting to you directly, or working with Sigyn here? She seems pretty smart. You should let her run things.
Loki: I am in charge.
Loki: Well, it’s been a ‘pleasure’ to meet you. I’ll be making some decisions very soon and I will let you know. Thanks for coming in.
Bob: Thanks for the interview. See you, Sigyn. We should do lunch sometime.
Aaaand she’s gone. Hmm. That was… interesting. She thinks I didn’t see that colossal eye-roll as she was leaving or hear her muttering something that sounded remarkably like “stupid horns…overcompensating…” Not since I tangled with the Black Widow have I felt so protective of my manhood. Sorry, Roberta, I don’t think you’ll be getting the job.