Loki no

I Didn’t Do (Most of) It, Part III: Mmmmbleargh

I swear by my pointy helmet that this was NOT my idea.

But did I encourage the demented mortals who thought these up?

Ehehehehehe!

Yes.

Yes, I did.

IMG_0925

You can’t unsee it now, can you?

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She’ll Feel A Fool, All Right, In About Another Week

The human female’s team at work has been scrambling busily, trying to turn in-person  classes into online classes.  The lectures have not been too difficult, but turning the labs into online experiences has been more challenging.  For the Heredity unit, the students usually observe crosses of  various mutant strains of Arabidopsis.   Normal seedlings have hairy leaves:

seedling with hairs

…but some of the mutants are bald.

Regular seedlings behave like proper plants, but some of the “special” ones are trans-genic–they’ve been gifted with the DNA that makes them produce a protein that glows an eerie green under blue light.

f1-hybrids-gfp1 x gl1

If they don’t have the glowy gene, they don’t show up at all under blue light–they’re just dark shapes:

homozygous gl1-no gfp

Since there isn’t a way for the students to have a petri dish of seedlings to look at, the human female had the bright idea to make sets of virtual seedlings.  She came up with little images of hairy and bald plants, and has been making spreads of what they’d look like in regular and blue light.

It’s very painstaking work.  She had to wrestle all the inheritance patterns and do the math to figure out how many seedlings should be hairy and glowy, how many hairy and not-glowy, how many bald and glowy, and how many bald and not glowy.  Then she had to divide up the hundreds of fictitious seedlings into twelve sets such that the students can only figure out the inheritance patterns if they score their seedlings their arrays and then pool their data with folks who have the other sets.  Each set has to be laid out exactly the same way in the visible light view and the blue light view so that the plants can be scored accurately.

It involves manipulating layers and layers of images.

She’s stepped away from her desk for a moment.  Let’s just scoot some of these little plants around, shall we?  (I don’t need to use a mouse–I have magic!)

arabidopsis

Let’s see….I’ll take out two of the hairy/glowy ones and substitute a hairy/not glowy and a bald/glowy.   And I’ll shuffle them around in the blue-light view…  And I’ll make set G a duplicate of set B…  And then I’ll re-label set J as set number 7

And then I’ll throw in another mutation that makes them grow upside down, and…

…and then I’ll fix it so that her original files show on her computer screen, but the changed ones will go up on the server for the teaching assistants to give to the students.

I will not get to call her April Fool today, but next week, when the assignment is given out and the frantic phone calls, texts, and zoom sessions begin, the tears and wailing of the human female will be very sweet indeed.

I can wait.

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Let Us Open Some Windows and Let in Some Fresh. . . Mischief

The human male has been working very, very hard lately.  I make computer mischief, he sorts it out.  I make more mischief, he drags himself to the next machine and deals with that one too.  Most of these computers where the humans work have made the move to something called “Windows TEN.”

I guess I have not yet mentioned here that I’ve diversified my mischief a bit.  The mortals all seem to eat, breathe, sleep, and spend every other moment of their pitiful lives interacting with their electronic devices and computational machines.  If I can bring them to their knees using that fact to my advantage, I will certainly do so.  Thus, I have been doing some coding  of my own on the side–moonlighting mischief, as it were—and I sneaked a good few “surprises” into this new TEN.

I don’t want the mortals to suspect, though, so I have made sure that each new boot-up displays this completely non-alarming message:

windows-10

Sigyn thinks that means I’m going to make sure that all the computers get a screensaver of cute puppies and kittens.

Shh!  Do not tell her that, instead of baby animals, this TEN is why the human female’s email at work will look weird and her computer will no longer recognizes her scanner, why all the lab computers will have to be either replaced or wiped and reloaded, why all the new computers for Anatomy and Physiology will come with their hard drives helpfully pre-encrypted so that trying to make one program profile and copying it to all the machines that have to be alike will get classified as “using pirated software” and the human male will have to spend a whole weekend fighting with them, and why nothing will work the way it used to–at all, at all, at all.  Ehehehehe!  If it can be changed, slowed down, made obsolete, or just plain broken, it will be

TEN, of course, stands for Totally Extremely Naughty.  

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And While I Am Down Here…

While I am down here in Room 303, showing you where I hid the human female’s ID card, I thought I’d do a little more mischief.

Room 303 is where most of the lab dishes get washed.  Test tubes, beakers, graduated cylinders–you name it, if it’s dirty, it comes here.

These tubs are full of spirometer parts.  Since people have breathed through them, they have to be soaked and disinfected to make sure no pestilence is spread.

gonna spit in the tub

In theory, this results in a sanitary experience for the next group of cardiopulmonary lab experimenters.

In practice, I always make it a point to spit in the spirometer-part-soaking-tubs, as part of my ongoing research into the effects of Jotun saliva on the cardiopulmonary health of university undergraduates.

I have reams of data to date.  Can publication be far behind?

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I Had A Visit From My Brother, And It Sucked

I have asked Thor to meet me here today in one of the human female’s prep rooms.  I told him I have something fun to show him.

Here he is now.

vacpump1

“Hail, brother!  It is too long since last we met.  It does my heart full well that you ask for my company!  You are looking well!”

“Uh, yeah.  You too.  Come look at this instrument the humans borrowed.  It has dials and pipes and a fan and all sorts of other bits.”

vacpump2

“Verily, that is a stupendous machine!  My Lady Jane has many devices, but not one of this ilk.  How is it called, and what it its purpose?”

“It’s a vacuum pump.  They are using it to vacuum-filter a large volume of reagent.”

“That is most marvelous.  How does it operate?”

“I’ll show you.  This is where the receiving flask is hooked up.  See?”

vacpump3

“Hmm.”

“No, look more closely.”

“Aye, Brother.”

vacpump4

vacpump5

“See, Thor?  Just like that.”

>|: [

An Unexpected Tantrum

“Hello, dearest!  Did you have a good time in the flowers?  Oh, that looks good–did you decide to do baking rather than botanizing?”

stevecake7

“No.  It’s the funniest thing.  I was sitting in a lily, just enjoying the sunshine, when Steve came by.  He’d been baking and thought I might like one of his mother’s apple cakes.”

Steve made this?!  And brought it to you?  Sigyn, I don’t like him bringing you things.”

stevecake8

“Oh, it was extra and he was just being friendly–”

stevecake9

Too friendly!  That star-spangled lunk needs to keep his eyes and his apple cake and his ‘Aw, shucks, ma’am’ act to himself.  I think it’s time he and Gungnir and I had a little chat.”

“Loki, wait!”

Oh.  I… I don’t know how to deal with door slamming.  I don’t think he’s mad at me.  At least, I hope he’s not mad at me…  Is it horrible of me if I hope he doesn’t find Steve until he’s had a chance to cool off?  *sigh*  I think I need to go talk to the human female and see if she knows how to deal with ruffled peacock feathers.  I can clean this up later.

……

stevecake10

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Helping With the Houseplants (Sigyn Speaks)

Hi! It’s me, Sigyn. Since it is so rainy today, I am helping with some indoor botany. There are some very nice African violets here in the house. I like to pet the furry leaves

violet-Sigyn.jpg

I am picking off the spent, faded blooms to keep the plants looking beautiful. These are destined for the compost heap.

Loki is helping t— Loki, NO!

violet-Loki.jpg

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