Midgardians will celebrate anything. Take today for example. I’m not sure who makes the decisions about such things, but today is National Taco Day. Seriously? There is a day just for this particular foodstuff? What’s next? National Tuna Sandwich Day? Official Banana Pudding Day? It’s insane!
Nonetheless, the humans have decided to have breakfast tacos this morning, and I have no objection. I am in favor of warm tortillas, potatoes, eggs, and assorted meatstuffs. I am even MORE in favor of the human female not touching my food, so we are eating out, at one of the humans’ favorite places. Sigyn and I have been here before. That’s odd: one of their drink machines seems to be malfunctioning today.
Hmmm. I wonder how that happened?
Mmmm! These smell good! We are inbound to the university, bringing breakfast for one of the human male’s coworkers as well. I can tell the human female just wants to put her face in the take-out bag and start gobbling, but I will fend her off until we arrive and can eat in a civilize manner.
Back, wench! These are not all yours. And see this paper bag? It’s leaking grease on your car upholstery. Yeah, you should be more careful.
Ah–here we are. Hot and tasty! I think Sigyn and I can eat this one all by ourselves,
which, sadly, will leave the human female without one, since apparently she CANNOT COUNT and has failed to purchase sufficient sustenance. Let this be a lesson to you, mortal. Plan your gluttony more carefully. Just think of this as an opportunity to fit a little better in your pants.