not me!

I’m actually very modest

I don’t always demand credit for my mischief.

For example, when, after tearing the house apart in a frantic search, the humans find this important scrap of paper under the refrigerator with the catnip mice, the milk jug rings, and the jingly balls, I will be only too happy when the cat gets the blame.


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Once again, Sigyn and I are traveling with the humans. They have chosen to stay at the most confusing inn I have ever encountered. Take, for example, this door near the lift.


Believe it or not, I did not do this. And what do you make of these instructions for egress in “the unlikely event” of fire? I shall give you a moment to ponder it…


1) Relative to the room in which we are staying, the map is upside down. 2) Room number 221 has been magically transported to the third floor. (Again, I did not do it.) And 3) The helpful “you are here” dot seems to suggest that we are standing in the parking lot, no doubt watching as the inn goes up in flames. (The map assumes one has managed to find the stairs, which I was unable to locate.)

Like the last inn we stayed at, this one has provided an adequate breakfast, though not one befitting the future ruler of Midgard. It does, however, feature a machine which makes a breakfast in the shape of this state. See what I cooked:


I have used my magic and my (grudgingly) acquired knowledge of this state to create a precipitation map. Note the plump, perfect eastern portion and increasing scantiness as one moves westward. The Plains and Panhandle are experiencing a drought, while the Trans-Pecos in the far west has had a bare 1.5″ of rain so far this year and scarcely registers at all. Sigyn is inspecting Galveston Bay in the compartment to her south.

Can we go home now?
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Not my doing

You may have seen this posting.  By Hogun’s topknot, I swear it was not I.   I was busy elsewhere doing something much more insidious, and to greater purpose.  (Or possibly I was rescuing Sigyn.  That takes up rather a lot of my time.  Not that I mind.)

Tinkering with door locks?  Pfft.  Beneath me.


Subject: Criminal Mischief – Heldenfels

14-0616-0002 – Criminal Mischief – Heldenfels

The reporting party advised someone tampered with a locked door to room 004C of the Heldenfels Building.  According to the reporting party, they only check the door every couple of months. No items were taken from the room.

This email is to inform you a criminal incident has occurred in or around your building.  It is important that you and others within your facility are aware of this incident.  If you would like additional information regarding this incident, please contact me.

If you are interested in exploring ways to enhance the safety and security of your building and its occupants, the University Police Department’s Crime Prevention Unit can assist.  We offer free security surveys to assist departments with enhancing the security of their facilities and personnel.  We also offer free presentations on a variety of crime prevention and security related topics.

We encourage community members to monitor the University Police Department’s Significant Activity Summaries.  This can be accesses at  or you can follow us on Facebook, Twitter, or RSS-Feed.

Again, if you have any questions or would like to schedule a security survey or crime prevention presentation, please do not hesitate to contact me.  For additional crime prevention information and resources, please visit the University Police website,   Blah, blah, blah

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