sigyn is not as good a hider as she thinks she is

A Late Spring/Early Summer Jaunt

The humans are traveling to see the male’s family in the tiny city rather far to the west.  Sigyn and I have tagged along.  Sigyn, because she likes long car rides and seeing new things; I, because new surroundings can equal new opportunities for mischief.

The roadsides have shifted from spring’s blue, pink, and white to that obnoxious orange-yellow shade that denotes late-spring/early summer in Texas.

late spring roadside

That photo doesn’t do it justice.  For miles and miles and miles, it’s as if someone melted all the school buses, number 2 pencils, and Kodak film boxes in the world and poured the resulting mess onto the roadsides.  Sigyn thinks it’s pretty.  I think that color adds about 3 degrees to the perceived ambient air temperature, which, believe me, is far too warm for comfort already.

The home we are visiting is a smallish one, so we are lodging in an in.  I have finally broken Sigyn of wanting to eat sink cakes, but she still enjoys a good game of hide and seek in new environment.

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Great Frigga’s hairpins!  Sigyn has vanished completely!  She is entirely invisible!  I will have to search long and hard if I am to discover her clever hiding place!

(the next morning)

True to form, the human female has headed straight for the funny-shaped breakfast maker on the buffet line.  This time her efforts have yielded a hazard map of the state.

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Northern Panhandle:  tornadoes.  Far west Trans-Pecos:  dust storms.  Lower Rio Grande  Valley:  hurricanes.  Southeast Texas:  alligators.  There is nothing for it but to apply butter and syrup and put the state out of its misery.

Sigyn, uncharacteristically, has opted for a slightly less sticky breakfast.  Is there anything more boring than raisin bran?

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Besides the human female, I mean.

Off to visit with the folks!  This is the part of the visit I’ve been looking forward to.   I understand there are baby photos of the male, which ought to be good for a laugh, his mother has some tech-support issues with her computer, and I’ve arranged for some chiggers to meet up with the female as she answers some garden questions for the mother-in-law.   See?  New opportunities for mischief!

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みんなでランチをしましょう, Part II: Amusements

There is more to do in this restaurant than slurp noodles, watch plates of raw fish go by, try to keep Sigyn off the sushi-go-round, and hope the human female obliges me by eating salmon and breaking out into something that makes her look like an itchy red lizard.

We have entertainment!

There is a slot in the wall near every table.  As one finishes a small plate of tasty osteichthyes and rice, one pushes the tiny tableware down the slot.  The computer above the table registers each deposition and shows a little animated story.  The more plates one deposits, the more one “helps” the anime character in his quest.

I admit that anime is largely lost on me–the characters all seem so stiff and toy-like, and their expressions scarcely change from scene to scene–but I am curious as to how the story will end.  The friend-of-a-friend says that if we poke enough plates down the slot, we will miraculously be gifted a gotcha ball with a tiny prize inside.

I do not care for trinkets, but I know Sigyn would adore to receive this gotcha ball.  Eat, mortals, eat!  You must consume as much raw fish as possible so that my sweetie can get a treat!

It appears to be working–the screen says a ball is coming our way.  We just need to feed the table a few more dishes.  Yes!  No, not quite yet…  Yes!  Fifteen tiny plates appears to be the gotcha threshold!

Sigyn loves the prize with all her heart and she hasn’t even opened it yet.

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Toss it down, love, and let us see what we’ve won.

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What…?  Oh, I see.  It is a minuscule pad of sticky notes bearing a badly-drawn unicorn.  I think is ridiculous, but all the females in our dining party making that “squee” noise that makes them sound like infant pigs and which hurts my sensitive ears.

Is that it?  That is all?  I suppose to obtain another prize we would have to redouble our gustatory efforts, and I, for one, am simply too full to attempt that.  No, not even for one of the miniature egg tartlets.

Sigyn, not one to waste an opportunity for fun, has suggested a game of hide-and-seek.  I shall volunteer to be the first seeker, as something makes me suspect that she already has a hiding place in mind.

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GREAT FRIGGA’S CORSET!!!  While my eyes were closed and averted, Sigyn jumped on the conveyor belt and rode it!  Ooooh!  Sometimes I just want to….!  Arrrgh!!!   My love, what would have become of you if one of the friends had not snatched you as you were preparing to depart our portion of the restaurant?!  Did you even think?!  I mean, we are in a place where people are conditioned to seize things that show up at their tables, especially if these things are small, cute, and/or tasty!  I might have lost you forever!

New Rule:  My beloved is not allowed within ten feet of anything that even remotely resembles a raw-fish conveyance.

No exceptions!

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Living High on the Hog

The human male and female rarely get to sleep in, but sometimes they do.  This morning, the human female has been an utter slug and is just now rising.  Lazy mortal!  I have been up plotting mischief for hours!

Oh ho!  It appears that the human male has lured her out of her nest of blankets with the promise of breakfast at a new cafe which has opened in the neighborhood.  I am feeling a mite peckish myself, and my sweetie deserves a treat, so I think that we will join them.

Look, Sigyn–they have a statue of the human female by the door.

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The interior is bright and homey.  Let us have a look at the menu.

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They serve eggs and other typical breakfast foods.  Sigyn, however, has zeroed in on something called “Biscuit French Toast.”

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I think just reading the menu is 500 calories.

We have given our order at the counter and been given a corresponding wooden spoon to take to our table.

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Two observations:  1)  Our spoon says “T“, and 2) Sigyn is not as good a hider as she thinks she is.

The human female ordered the fried chicken waffles biscuit french toast.

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Oh, I am so naughty!  I had them garnish it with an okra pod, to which she is allergic!  If she removes it, she should be all right, but it’s my first bit of mischief for today, and I think it’s a good one.

The human male ordered the dreamsicle biscuit french toast.

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I think Sigyn is contemplating bypassing the biscuits altogether and just diving into the orange mascarpone…

Mmmm.  Everything is delicious!  The humans have each eaten half of their food and then swapped plates, so we are all sharing.  The syrup for the chicken has black pepper and sage, while the orangey syrup and fluffy mascarpone are causing the human female to make embarrassing little moany noises.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say we’ll probably be back.

Sigyn, in fact, doesn’t even want to leave and is hiding near the cash register.

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Beloved, your cute little giggle gives you away…

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