Loki Takes New York, Day 12: Last Chance for Anything

Well, even though it is our very LAST day in the city, and thus our last chance to try to get to any of the sights or shops or events that the humans have on their long, long list of unfinished business, they are most definitely slow off the mark this morning.  AT my nudging, the weather has deteriorated to cold and rainy, the male’s knee is bothering him, and the female is twitchy because she feels certain that whatever they don’t get to see will have been the best thing ever.  They’ve made one false start, going back to the hotel for jackets, so now the day is half gone and tempers are fraying.

Breakfast or lunch?  Breakfast or lunch?  Lunch it is.  We are trying one last international meal.  Sigyn, I’m not sure we’ve sampled any of these things before.


“Soft bean curd?” “Ox-knee jelly bone?!”  Um…  Let’s say I have… reservations.

And, um, please tell me that “Bat” is the name of the proprietor, and not something else that’s on the menu.


I do not think this is what we ordered.  I think this is just the previews.


(nibble, nibble)  Wah!   By Volstagg’s straining belt notch!  Sigyn, I know  you like red, but be advised that the color in the red cabbage and the red potatoes is not due to tomato but instead owes more than a little to our friends of the genus Capsicum.

Ah.  The entrees are here.  The human female has ordered something I didn’t quite catch the name of–it sounded like “beep beep boop,” but I don’t suppose that’s right .


Looks just like egg and vegetables and meat over rice.  Harmless enough, I suppose.  Unless the meat used to like to hang upside down in a cave

I have just learned that our prime destination today is another museum.  Auuuugh!  Shoot me now.

And here we are, dripping and ready resigned to look at more stuff.  Hmm.  The humans say this used to be someone’s house and that most of the contents belonged to him.  That’s a little different.

Now this is what I call a study!


Plushy furniture, silk damask wallpaper, huge display of private opulence.  The sheer excess of it all makes my greedy little heart go pitter-pat.  The tourguide/guard is kind of sour and cranky and is giving the human male and his fancy camera the stink-eye, which is a nice bonus for me!

Off the study is a room-sized steel vault, where Mister Moneybags used to keep the cream of his book crop.


No, I’m not drooling; you’re drooling.

The next room is a vast library full of thousands of volumes, each one worth more than the humans, their felines, and the pitiful entirety of their worldly possessions all rolled together.

Sigyn and I especially like this book, which is open for display.


Why?  If you look closely, you can see that the people in the illumination are having pretzels for supper.


(a bit later)  That was a lot of books!  Most of them old and very rare.  I approve of books, though I wish that they weren’t all locked up.  I’d have liked to page through them.

Now we are in part of the house that is more museum-y.   There’s an exhibit of works by a modern sketch/paint artist.  I can’t say I think much of most of it…


… but this one is making me hungry.

There is one whole room full of engraved cylinder seals from ancient Assyria.  I must admit, these are frankly amazing.  They look like shiny pieces of stone, but when rolled into wet clay, they create very intricate impressions.  When I take over Midgard, I will have to re-institute these as a means of authenticating documents.


Look at that detail!  That lion is so very fierce and lifelike.  Truly fit for a king!  Although, for some reason, I find that I identify with that antelope…

If the seals were astonishing, the collection of autographs in the next room is even moreso.

This one was signed by a man who would become a famous, if doomed, medieval English King.


Hmm.  Perhaps I should practice my flourishy penmanship.  When I come to rule this corner of the cosmos, my scribblings will be worth millions.

That was a pleasant way to while away a few hours.  The humans are hoping the weather has improved while we were indoors.

Not so much.


The skyscrapers have all been cut off about fifteen stories up.  So sad!   If it’s this foggy in the afternoon, there’s no chance at all that there will be clear viewing tonight.  Four tries and four misses!  I have succeeded in doing the humans out of their much-awaited trip to the top of that very tall building.

Faced with that sad reality, they have decided to trek to the human female’s favorite building.  Here it is in all its glory:


In the photograph of it that hangs in its lobby.

And, oh, look!  A photo of it lit up at night!


Eh he he he!  And that’s as close as you’re ever going to get, mortals!

The human male has had enough walking.  The female, despite blisters forming under her blisters, has decided there are a few more things she simply has to see, so now we are striding off in search of a pair of famous statues.

Found them.


She wanted to explore the inside of this building–I take it it’s another library–because a) books! and b) there’s an art exhibit inside she wishes to see, but I can’t pass up an opportunity for some mischief, so they have announced closing time about four minutes after we entered.

Nothing for it now but to go back to the inn and try to decide on a place to eat our last dinner in this city.

(later)  With a predictable lack of imagination, the humans have ended up back at one of the first places they ate at!  More shawarma,  but this time accompanied by these strange dark balls.


The human male says they’re called fall-awful.  And you really propose to eat them?!

Well, Sigyn, that’s pretty much the end of this trip.  We’ve seen a lot of art (possibly too much, but I’m glad you liked it all), and I have some fine ideas for my eventual palace and a few notions of how to make correspondence less dull.  We’ve had some interesting food, looked at some flowers, and tried at least seven methods of transportation that I can think of (plane, foot, train, ferry, sailboat, bus, private car.)

Now there’s nothing left to do except sit back, think over our adventure, and watch the humans try to wedge all the accumulated clobber into their very-overstuffed suitcases…

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Loki Takes New York, Day 2: In Which I Am Grudgingly Impressed

This is our first full day in the Big Pear  (Banana?  Some fruit or other.  I can’t be bothered to keep track of botany. That’s the human female’s thing.)

Our first order of business is an early lunch (we are getting a bit of late start today.)  One block over and two blocks down, the humans have located an eatery named “Tabouleh.”  That sounds uncomfortably close to “taboo.”  Perhaps some of the items on the menu are forbidden to certain people?  Illicit foodstuffs.  Sounds intriguing.

Sounds risky.

The human female has ordered something called “chicken shwarma.”  Shwarma… I seem to recall sitting chained to a lightpost a few blocks over from here, with nothing but bread and water while my stupid brother and his friends ate “shwarma.”


The human female says it is delicious.  I don’t trust it.

The human male has chosen today’s activity.  On the west side of this island is a mostly-floating museum.  One part of it consists of a small, very cramped submersible ship, intriguingly named “The Growler,” which we have just toured.

I had not realized before today just how un-fond I am of narrow, metal, green-painted surroundings.

Sigyn thought it was “cozy.”

A second part of the museum consists of a broad plaza which houses this sleek and pointy aircraft.


They tell me it could fly several times the speed of sound.  I suppose if one cannot teleport that might come in handy.  When I come to rule this realm, I shall have a fleet of such airships, because I refuse to waste good magic on minions and whatnot.

A building at the end of the plaza houses an aircraft which the human male says was the prototype for a fleet which used to routinely fly to space and back.  That sounds (as they say) “hinky” to me.  The whole galaxy knows that Midgardians have scarce made it off this rock.

The remainder of the collection is actually housed on board an enormous ship the size of a small town.  All sorts of flying vessels line the deck.


I like this one.  It looks wickedly efficient.  The skull-and-crossbones flag is a nice touch, though if I…appropriate this craft I will need to replace it with something a little more “Loki.”

No! Wait.  This one!


Sleek, black, and stealthy as my heart.   Come to Loki, you sweet thing.

Inside the ship/museum, there are many other exhibits, including a helicopter cockpit in which one can sit.


Somehow, it does not seem to have been designed for someone of my kingly stature.

(later)  It is now after nightfall.  We appear to be strolling aimlessly about.  The human female calls it “getting a feel for the neighborhood.”

I call it “getting lost.”


I gather that it is possible to ascend to the top of this imposing edifice–for a price. The humans intend to do just that, so that they can have a view of this whole metropolis at once.  Tickets are pricey and difficult to obtain.  I will have to see what I can do…

…to thwart them.

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