In Which I Am Grudgingly Thankful

Oh, look.  It’s the annual eat-until-you-are-more-than-half-afraid-you’ll-burst holiday.  Didn’t we just do this?

Sigyn says it’s also a day for giving thanks.  She says I should make a list of my “blessings.”

I am not one naturally given to gratitude–or platitudes–but I suppose I am at least marginally thankful for the following:

  1. Sigyn, of course.
  2. Good health.  I am the epitome of perfection, so no complaints here.  Sigyn is fine too.
  3. Plenty of work.  There is always something to bung up, disconnect, unbalance, leave fingerprints on, loosen the cap of, cancel an order for, or submit a bogus requisition for.
  4.  It is still Too Wet to Mow.  I’ve gotten out of more yard work this fall, and the human female is ashamed of the state of the lawn.
  5.   The Terror Twins.  I’ve trained them well, and they are now expert-level toy stashers.  The house is full of mice and balls and none are in evidence.  Taffy is into everything, and Flannel has learned how to barf from the top level of the cat tree.
  6. Colored leaves. (Sigyn made me add that one.)
  7. The human female.  With her penchant for falling down, running into doorways and desk corners, and bludgeoning herself with lawn equipment, she’s an endless source of amusement.  If I were making Thanksgiving dinner and she didn’t live in the house, I wouldn’t invite her, but she has her  uses.
  8. Pie.

It’s a short list, but again, I’m not one for huge displays or mushy emotions.  It will have to do.

Pass the pie.

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Eating Practice

The annual Eating Holiday is upon us once more. Didn’t we just do this?  Where has a year gone?  Ah, well.  Far be it from me to repine when there is a deadly sin to celebrate!  All hail, gluttony! 

As usual, the human female is partaking of the pre-holiday meal of thanks at her workplace, a sort of warm-up to the main event.  Wouldn’t you know that’s how she would ease herself back into work after all the pathetic sore-foot lounging?

Guests are encouraged to trace a “hand turkey” on the lab whiteboard while they wait in line for the repast.


I fail to see the appeal.

At last!  Come, Sigyn, let’s see what’s on offer this year.


Hmm.  Turkey, gravy, something yellow, and a few greenish things.  Oh, and some of the many pounds of smashed tubers the human female prepared.  At least, I think she brought them.  I saw the large bag of brown vegetables, the peeler, and the knife last night, and it looked so suspiciously like work and reminded me so much of last year’s Solanaceous carnage that I made myself scarce.

Idunn’s little apples!  She has gone back through the food line for something else, and it is green too. Let us examine the “green things” more closely.


What do you think it is, Sigyn?  I…I think I can detect some sort of vegetable under a sauce made of…fungi?  That can’t be right.  I don’t trust it…

And what about this?


More vegetables… Bits of –is that apple?  Some type of creamy sauce…  But what are those little black specks?  Now, I’m no entomologist, but I do know what caterpillar frass looks like, so yeah, I’m going to give this stuff a wiiiiiide berth, Sigyn, and I suggest you do the same.

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