there IS such a thing as a blue tarantula but these aren’t them

A Mini-safari, Part II: Scuttley Things


Sigyn, let us suspend our perusal of the crayfish and see what else is living here in 302. I wonder what’s in this aquarium? Whatever it is, I hope it breathes air, because there isn’t any water.


In fact, it looks like the beach at low tide, or some long-abandoned sea floor. Can you spy anything?


Odin’s Eyepatch!  That seashell just moved! What’s inside it, Sigyn, can you tell?

I see… claws.

Oh, now I remember!  I’ve heard of these crustaceous beasts-–they are hermit crabs.  They live in cast-off shells that mollusks of various ilks (and whelks) are finished with.  Sort of how the human female does all of her clothes shopping at Bonhomie and other second-hand stores.  Unlike the human female, however, these crabs know when they’ve outgrown their vestiture and move on to a larger size.

What shall we name this fellow, my love? I’m thinking something exotic, such as “Rangoon.”

Moving on.

Careful, Sigyn. You remember what’s in these little cages–big, hairy spiders, large enough to carry you off.  It’s a good thing they’re securely housed.


Hmm.  Either this arachnid already has a name, or the humans are even more color-blind than I thought.


Oh.  The name on your cage says, “Betty.”  The human female says she’s supposed to be small and calm, but she looks pretty sprightly to me!

Tarantulas are such fascinating creatures.  I like their multi-leggedness and their furriness.  I approve of the excess of eyes and the fangy bits.  I also like how they can scrunch down into little spaces.  Little, dark places–like the human female’s shoe…

One, two, three, four, five…  Can the humans count that high, or would they not miss one if it happened to follow me home?

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