Last week, I made sure that the humans got a whole load of judgey, depressing email. Today, I’m working my mischief on the humans’ regular mail as well.
I know for a fact that the humans enjoy getting the mail. There’s always the chance (however remote) that there will be a letter from a friend, an interesting catalog, or even the needlework kit that the female ordered back in JANUARY.
Bill, bill, auto dealership ad, flyer for a new pizza restaurant—nothing, really, to make the sixty foot trip to the box in 100-degree heat worth it.
Oh—wait. Ehehehehe! I’ve been planning this for a week or two, but I didn’t think it would come today. The envelope’s just appealing enough on the outside that the humans may actually open it.
See? It looks important.
Civic pride, and all that.
Look! Kids! No one can resist giving money to something that’s for kids.
I sent out a thousand of these. Even if only a few
suckers recipients respond, it’ll net me some useful cash.
Fandral’s mustache! The humans are laughing and pointing. What?! The wording is perfect! I spent a lot of time on this.
This bears closer inspection…
I still don’t see anyth— Oh.